


Fill My Cup, Run It Over

by ravenbringslight



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crying, Declarations Of Love, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Light Bondage, M/M, Pony Play, Porn with Feelings, Pre-Thor (2011), Sibling Incest, and a bit of loki's internal melodrama, or rather pony play interruptus, unrealistically healthy communication skills
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 13:24:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16934055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenbringslight/pseuds/ravenbringslight
Summary: Loki gets overwhelmed in the middle of a bit of kinky sex, and the brothers realize that just sex isn't enough to keep them together—they need something more





	Fill My Cup, Run It Over

**Author's Note:**

> written for a [kinkmeme prompt](https://thorkikinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/1493.html?thread=4821#cmt4821) by fabaulti:
> 
>  
> 
> _"Here comes that super-vanilla prompt because I'm weak:_
> 
>  
> 
> _Thor and Loki have their usual kinky/rough sex and Loki gets a little overwhelmed by everything and asks Thor to stop. Thor does and takes his time to take care of Loki, and when he's okay, they have the most passionate, loving sex they had in a while. Nothing kinky, nothing rough. Just slow, passionate love-making._
> 
>  
> 
> _I don't mind Loki being male, trans or intersex. Go with whatever you're comfortable. I just want him to be loved."_

Loki wasn’t quite sure when he’d started feeling uneasy about being with Thor. He’d been so high on the rush of it at first—the taboo, the secrecy, the unbelievable thrill that _Thor wanted him too_ —that nothing else had mattered. But now that it had been going on for awhile, and the initial excitement had settled down into something more familiar, he was feeling uncomfortable. A bit wrong footed. And he wasn’t quite sure why, because he still loved Thor, sometimes to the point of complete overwhelm, and he still craved every touch that they could get away with, and yet…

Duties and life had been keeping them from each other for almost a year now. They still both nominally lived at the palace, but their interactions in day-to-day life were few. The time they managed to steal for themselves was too little, and they spent almost all of it fucking.

Thor would come to Loki’s rooms still sweaty from the training grounds, push both their breeches to their knees, and take him roughly over the arm of the couch. Or Loki would find Thor in the stables after he returned home from a trip, and Thor would take a riding crop from the wall, and they’d make a mess of each other right there in the hay. It was often quick, and rough, and they didn’t get to spend time with each other before or afterwards.

The night Loki finally figured out what was wrong, he’d just gotten home from a week spent at the library complex in Alfheim training with one of their sorcerers. He dragged himself to his rooms, exhausted and achy after a week of overextending his seidr, and Thor was waiting for him. Loki was so happy to see him that his heart swelled in his chest, and he wanted nothing more than to just collapse into his brother’s lap and hang on his neck, and tell him about everything that he’d been learning in between kisses sweet as honey. And maybe to doze there, wrapped in Thor’s strong arms, the fire crackling in the hearth and everything right in the world.

Instead, Thor arched an eyebrow at him and held up a belt, and before Loki knew it his wrists were lashed together and hooked over the top of the tall bedpost, and Thor was taking him standing up, their skin slapping roughly together and Loki’s cheek digging uncomfortably into the ornately carved wood.

Thor left afterwards, and Loki crawled into bed, feeling strangely empty and unsatisfied despite the orgasm Thor had wrung from him. It was there in the dark that Loki finally realized what was missing. They’d barely spoken two words to each other the entire time. There had been no welcoming, no honeyed kisses, nothing to indicate that he was anything more to Thor than just another fuck. Maybe this entire thing had been a mistake; a line they never should have crossed, doomed from the start. How could brothers hope to be lovers? A tear slipped from his eye unbidden as Loki wondered for the first time if his brother actually loved him like that at all or if he’d been fooling himself this entire time.

*

“Brother, come to my chambers tonight,” Thor murmured in Loki’s ear. He’d caught Loki’s elbow in the crowd of people filtering out of the security council meeting, and his breath was warm and clove-scented and sent a shiver down Loki’s spine. “I have nothing to do until tomorrow morning for once.”

“I don’t either,” Loki breathed, trying not to move his mouth. “Eight?”

Thor nodded just barely, and was gone before Loki could even properly catch his breath.

Loki moved around on a bit of a cloud for the rest of the day. An entire evening, and nothing to do until morning! He felt a bit fluttery and nervous, as though he were going to Thor’s rooms for the first time instead of the hundredth. It was entirely silly. And yet Loki didn’t even bother to try and squash his happiness, the lightness of his movements, the ease of his smiles.

When eight o’clock came around, Loki was already knocking on his brother’s door. Thor hauled him in with a grin, slamming the door behind them, and drew Loki towards the bedroom.

“Wait til you see what I found,” Thor said, giving Loki’s hand a squeeze. “Since you like the crop so much I thought you might like this as well—”

Sitting on Thor’s bed was a box, and in the box was a mess of leather straps and buckles.

“What is this?” Loki said, picking it up and letting it dangle.

“A harness!” Thor said brightly. “Look, this part goes around your chest, and this part here goes around you like this, and—”

“Thor,” Loki choked out, holding up a separate piece that had a thin metal rod on it a handspan long. “Is this a _bit_?”

Loki was slightly taken aback, but Thor looked so enthusiastic about it that Loki swallowed his initial reaction, which was to take the entire thing and throw it out the window. A bit of a lump was starting to settle in his stomach.

He wanted to be with Thor so badly though, and this was what Thor wanted to do apparently, and Loki was damned if he was going to ruin it by being a wet blanket. So he let Thor undress him, and fasten the straps around him, and he even let Thor push him down to all fours on the soft rug next to the bed.

“Look at you,” Thor breathed. “I wish you could see what I see. You look incredible.”

Loki made a face at him and Thor laughed.

“I feel ridiculous,” Loki complained.

“You don’t look it,” Thor said.

He knelt behind Loki and started running his hands over him, up his shivering flanks, dragging down his spine, taking one of Loki’s cheeks in each hand and pulling them apart.

“ _Ah_ ,” Loki said softly as Thor pursed his lips and blew warm breath over his hole.

Thor worked him over with his hands and Loki relaxed a little. This wasn’t so bad. He could get through this.

“I’m going to bridle you,” Thor husked into Loki’s ear. He was draped over Loki’s back now, pushing his hard cock against his ass, and Loki trembled. His arms were starting to get stiff, and his knees hurt. And he didn’t want to be doing this, not any of it. Well, he wanted Thor to be touching him, but not like this. Not like he was an animal instead of a person worthy of love.

Loki let his head hang down as Thor grabbed the bit from the box.

“Open up for me, little filly,” Thor said, taking hold of Loki’s jaw and forcing his head up.

He drew back in surprise though, and the dark lust in his eyes was replaced quickly by concern.

“Brother, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

Loki didn’t even realize he had been crying, but suddenly he couldn’t stop. He lurched to his feet and dashed the tears from his eyes angrily, then started yanking at the mess of straps crisscrossing his body.

“I hate this!” Loki cried. “I hate this stupid thing, and I hate that awful thing even more.”

“I’m sorry—” Thor started, but Loki wasn’t done.

“I’m not an animal! I’m not just some...some hole for you to fuck! Norns, get this fucking thing _off_ of me!” He’d been wrestling with the harness the entire time, and he finally gave up and threw his hands in the air and then buried his weeping face in them.

Loki felt warm hands on his shoulders, gently turning him around, and then Thor was folding him into a full body hug. He fell against Thor’s chest, hiccuping, and hugged him back fiercely.

“I’m sorry,” Thor was murmuring, over and over, “I’m sorry.”

Thor started undoing all the buckles and Loki closed his eyes and willed his tears to stop. Once they got the harness off of him, Loki sat down on the edge of the bed and stared at his feet, sniffling. He didn’t know what to do. He was embarrassed, and upset, and overwhelmed, and he wanted to tell Thor all the things that were bothering him, but he didn’t think Thor wanted to hear them.

Thor sat down next to him and put his hand on Loki’s neck and squeezed lightly.

“I don’t think you’re just a hole to fuck,” Thor said softly. “Or an animal.”

Loki sniffled. “I should just go,” he said, his voice still watery. “I’m sorry I ruined everything.”

“You didn’t ruin anything,” Thor said. “I’m just surprised. This doesn’t sound like something that just started bothering you tonight.”

“It isn’t,” Loki agreed, twisting his fingers together. “It’s been...awhile.”

“Oh, sweetling,” Thor said, and folded Loki into another hug. “Tell me.”

This was so much the Thor of Loki’s fantasies that he found himself spilling all his fears into Thor’s willing chest.

“We never see each other anymore,” Loki said, struggling not to start crying again, “and when we do, we just f-fuck, and then you leave, and we don’t even talk, or kiss, or anything, and…”

“We’ve been busy,” Thor said.

“I know,” Loki said miserably. “But still.”

“I thought you liked the fucking,” Thor said, his tone carefully neutral. Maybe trying not to sound hurt. His hand was stroking Loki’s arm. “You never said anything about it before.”

“I do,” Loki said. “It’s good, it’s just...Norns, this is so stupid…” He paused to take a deep breath then spit out in a rush, “Don’t you dare make fun of me, but sometimes I want to make love instead.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Thor said in hushed surprise. “Is that the problem? Loki, do you not know how much I love you?”

Loki shook his head against Thor’s chest. Thor cupped his neck and tilted his face up to look at him. It made Loki feel so exposed and vulnerable that he closed his eyes, and Thor craned his neck and kissed each one of Loki’s eyelids.

“Look at me, sweetling,” Thor said. “I love you. I love you so much that sometimes it feels like I might shatter into pieces. When we’re apart I feel like I’m missing a piece of myself, and I can’t breathe until I see you again.”

Loki had begun weeping again at Thor’s words, and a relief so great it left him lightheaded swept through him. Thor did love him; his words were ones Loki could have spoken himself.

“If I haven’t been saying it, it’s only because I thought you already knew,” Thor said, rubbing the tears from Loki’s cheeks. “And if my actions haven’t shown it, I’m sorry. I’ve just been under so much stress lately...and maybe I haven’t been paying enough attention to what you need…”

Loki shook his head.

“I haven’t been telling you what I need,” he said through his tears. “I didn’t know it myself at first, and once I did I didn’t know how to tell you. Tonight I just...I just broke I guess…”

“Look at us now though,” Thor said, smiling, and kissed Loki once on the lips, soft and lingering. “Communicating like civilized people.”

“Don’t tell anyone,” Loki said, one corner of his mouth going up. “My reputation will be ruined.”

“Come here,” Thor said. He let go of Loki to settle himself on the bed, then held his arm out and patted the space next to him. Gratefully, Loki snuggled down next to him and burrowed into his side. Thor’s voice was a deep rumble that vibrated through Loki’s chest. “Tell me what you’ve been doing for the last month…”

They laid entwined and simply talked for hours. Loki finally did get to tell Thor about his trip to Alfheim, and Thor told him about the diplomatic headache of a mission Odin had sent him on two months ago. Loki’s tears dried up completely. They laughed, and teased each other. A fist that been been clenched tightly around Loki’s heart began to loosen. He found himself tracing circles on Thor’s ribs, and around his navel, and up and around each nipple, and Thor wriggled pleasantly under his touch and kissed his hair and his cheek and put his hand, huge and warm, on Loki’s waist. They nuzzled at each other with noses and playfully nipping lips. Loki kissed the hinge of Thor’s jaw and Thor hummed happily. He did it again, and lipped at the little dip behind Thor’s ear, and then at the soft velvety earlobe, and Thor pressed against him with a deep inhale.

“I missed this too,” Thor said, “although I don’t think I realized quite how much until now.”

Loki hooked his leg around Thor’s and clasped the whole length of their bodies together. It still somehow didn’t seem close enough, it never could, but that wouldn’t stop Loki from trying. He offered up his lips and Thor took them, kissing him deeply, the tips of their tongues chasing each other.

“Can we do this tonight?” Loki whispered.

“Just kiss?” Thor asked, trying and failing to hide his dismay, and much as Loki might have loved to draw out the teasing a bit, he took pity on him.

“Don’t be daft,” Loki said, smiling. “I just meant...slow, like this. Gentle.”

“Tell me whatever you need tonight,” Thor said, “and I’ll do it. Even if it _is_ only kissing, though I admit I would be incredibly disappointed.”

“I just need you,” Loki said.

He pulled Thor on top of him and kissed him again, long and deep. Thor returned it hungrily. Loki thought that if he’d been pressed, that this would be his answer for his favorite place to be in all the world; trapped firmly under his brother’s warm body, locked into his gravity, their hearts turned towards one purpose, their breath in each other’s lungs. Who was anyone to tell him that this was wrong? That he shouldn’t seek this here in his brother’s bed—his brother who by his own account loved him past these false borders, past pain and beyond it into something far more exquisite? A country undiscovered except for by the two of them, together?

He’d briefly feared that maybe this had been a mistake, but now every one of his cells cried out at the rightness of it.

Loki sank into the soft nest of blankets and Thor worked him over, kissing, touching, kneading. Licking. He scraped his teeth gently on Loki’s collarbones, and each nipple, and the points of his hips. Loki gasped and sighed and held Thor’s head to him. Arched into his touches. Every square inch of him was anointed with Thor’s breath, the wetness of his mouth, the roughness of his hands. As each part of his body fell under his brother’s sway, Loki felt like he somehow, impossibly, loved Thor more and more. He was probably just hysterical from the stress of the evening. He didn’t care though. All he knew was that he felt like he was a chalice made of spun glass, and that Thor was just filling him up, up and up and up, until he was brimming, until one more drop would make him spill over. Flood out until he soaked into every inch of Thor’s skin as well, and made him feel the same love he was pouring into Loki.

“I need you now,” Loki said raggedly, “brother please I need you.”

When Thor finally sank into him, Loki clung to him, one arm around his shoulders and the other around the back of his neck, and wrapped his legs around him too. Would have enveloped him completely if he could, melded them together into one being named simply “brother.”

Thor kissed his cheek with trembling lips.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he said roughly, his mouth moving against Loki’s skin. “Gods. You’ve been right here and I’ve missed you so much. Loki. My sweetling. My heart.”

“I love you, I love you,” Loki babbled as Thor started moving in him. “ _Ahhh_ , fuck, Thor, Thor...love...you…”

“Never hurt you again,” Thor swore, “never, I’ll die first.”

“ _Ahhhhh-h-h_ ,” Loki stuttered out, high and drawn out, and tightened his hold around Thor’s body. His cock was trapped between their bellies, rubbing against Thor with every roll of his hips, and his pleasure was already started to spiral upward into release. He’d been so buffeted by his emotions tonight, experienced such lows and such highs, that now he felt he was climbing up to the edge of something devastating. His cup just waiting for that one last drop to spill over.

“Yes, yes, yes,” Loki chanted breathlessly, arching up into Thor. Thor wasn’t even moving quickly, just a long slow ruinous slide in and out, but somehow the unrelenting intensity dragged Loki higher and higher, made him squirm and cry out. “Don’t stop,” Loki pleaded breathlessly. “Just...like this...just…”

When release broke over him, it was a tiny eternity of star-white bliss. Loki cried out and Thor covered his mouth with his own, swallowing his ecstasy. Loki rode the crest of the wave over and out and down, every sinew of his body locked tight, until finally he came to rest in the shallows amid the wreckage of himself. Thor came a moment later, burying his face in Loki’s neck and thrusting into him one last time with a long groan, holding them tightly together.

Neither one of them moved for a long time. Occasionally Loki would tighten himself around where Thor was still seated inside of him, and Thor would give him a little wiggle in return and make Loki smile, but mostly they just lay there and listened to each other breathe until their sweat had finally dried and their heartbeats had returned to normal. Loki realized that the uneasiness he’d been living with for so long was gone, and that something else had taken its place. A deep certainty. He was Thor’s and Thor was his. Nothing could tear them apart, not even themselves.

When Thor finally rolled onto his side, he still didn’t withdraw himself, and they dozed off in each other’s arms with Thor’s softened cock still inside Loki and both of their spend drying onto their skin.

When they woke up in the small hours of the morning, they did it all over again.

“We won’t let this happen again,” Thor promised in the dark afterwards. “We’ll try harder, and when we need more or different we’ll say so.”

“Thank you,” Loki said. “For tonight.”

Thor kissed him.

“Also the other time tonight,” Loki continued, a teasing note in his voice, “and in advance for the morning—”

“You’re insatiable,” Thor said, and though it was dark Loki could feel the smile in his lips where they pressed against his.

“You can even get the crop out if you want…” Loki whispered.

He ended up having to thank Thor for the fourth time, as well.


End file.
